« All Night Quotes · Jack Handey's Page
Night Quotes by Jack Handey
- I think somebody should come up with a way to breed a very large shrimp. That way, you could ride him, then after you camped…
- Isn't it funny how we'll look out the window at the moon, and then we notice it's not the moon but a streetlight? Also what's…
- I bet what happend was, they discovered fire and invented the wheel on the same day. Then, that night, they burned the wheel.
- Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night, with no other cars around, I start imagining: What if there were…
- Too bad when I was a kid there wasn't a guy in our class that everybody called the "Cricket Boy", because I would have liked…
- If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of…
More Night Quotes
- I tend to think that there is a sophistication to everything at 'Saturday Night Live,' including the sketches. — Fred Armisen
- I couldn't sleep one night and I was sitting in my office and I realized that I was an independent filmmaker. — Darren Aronofsky
- Creationists make it sound as though a 'theory' is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night. — Isaac Asimov
- Hemingway is terribly limited. His technique is good for short stories, for people who meet once in a bar very late at… — Wystan Hugh Auden
- It was a wrong number that started it, the telephone ringing three times in the dead of night, and the voice on… — Paul Auster
- What used to keep me up at night was the fact that I didn't know how I was going to pay the… — Paul Auster
- Look out into the universe and contemplate the glory of God. Observe the stars, millions of them, twinkling in the night sky,… — Sai Baba
- I do Skid Row every night. — Sebastian Bach
- The repose of sleep refreshes only the body. It rarely sets the soul at rest. The repose of the night does not… — Gaston Bachelard
- A good husband is never the first to go to sleep at night or the last to awake in the morning. — Honore de Balzac
- Between the daylight gambler and the player at night there is the same difference that lies between a careless husband and the… — Honore de Balzac
- Sometimes I have wrinkles, in the morning. It depends on what kind of night that I had. I accept myself and the… — Antonio Banderas