« All Like You Quotes · Jack Handey's Page
Like You Quotes by Jack Handey
- If you're at a Thanksgiving dinner, but you don't like the stuffing or the cranberry sauce or anything else, just pretend like you're eating it,…
- Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: straddle a big crack in the ground, and if it opened wider, go "Whoa! Whoa!" and…
- If you ever feel like you're on the verge of a nervous breakdown, just follow these simple rules: First, calm down; second, come over and…
- Life, to me, is like a quiet forest pool, one that needs a direct hit from a big rock half-buried in the ground. You pull…
- I hate it when people say somebody has a "speech impediment", even if he does, because it could hurt his feelings. So instead, I call…
More Like You Quotes
- Minority is about being an individual. It's like you have to sift through the darkness to find your place and be that… — Billie Joe Armstrong
- I tell my students, it's not difficult to identify with somebody like yourself, somebody next door who looks like you. What's more… — Chinua Achebe
- Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do it. — Russell Baker
- It was dripping and, you know, and there was a whole line of cameras and microphones. I felt like - you remember… — Jim Bakker
- When you are portraying somebody that has a very specific emotional weight, you feel like you're really starting to abandon your own… — Javier Bardem
- Great dad. Yeah, he would ask me for money on birthdays and, you know, inappropriate times. And I just wrote him off… — Drew Barrymore
- It's the worst when you're kissing someone who's not a good kisser, and you're trying to make it look good, but you… — Drew Barrymore
- The best plan now is to have as many bosses as possible. I call it boss diversity. If you work for a… — Scott Adams
- It's hard to give up the self-esteem connected to being codependent and appearing 'right,' which is probably a survival behavior learned from… — Melody Beattie
- I wouldn't be able to write a song like 'Someone Like You' and get someone else to sing it because it's so… — Adele
- What makes it difficult for people trying to follow a dream is that the whole time you feel like you're slamming your… — Lewis Black
- This music business can suck all the love out of you, all the compassion for people - you can start to think… — Mary J. Blige