Funny facebook status Quote by Anonymous

I lay my head on the wheel and the horn begins honking, the whole neighborhood knows that I'm home drunk again.

— George Jones

In the Third World, honk your horn only under the following circumstances: 1. When anything blocks the road. 2. When anything doesn't. 3. When…

— P. J. O'Rourke

When you are driving, watch for animals that are dead ahead.

— Green Monk

Cars beep, beep when they pass us by. Now its time to get down to business.

— Big Time Rush

Anytime a bird takes a crap on my car, I eat an entire plate of scrambled eggs on my porch. Just to show the…

— Anonymous

I think we should only get 3 honks a month on the car horn. Then, someone cuts you off, you press the horn, and…

— Mitch Hedberg

Driving to work playing the 'Let's see how long I can drive with my gas light on.' game.

— Anonymous

I shaved my commute time in half by changing my car's horn to sound like gunfire.

— Anonymous

I changed my car horn sound to gun shots, people move out of the way much faster now.

— Itsme867

Any time I wind up in the lane where you can't quickly turn off of it and it's turning into the freeway, I just…

— Amy Heckerling

Whenever I drive under a yellow light, I always kiss my finger and tap it on the roof of the car.

— Jared Padalecki

A careful driver is one who honks their horn when going through a red light

— Toni Watson