What a crock. I could easily overemphasize the importance of good grammar. For example, I could say: Bad grammar is the leading… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I'm reading "Team of Rivals'' I'll probably ending up reading a bunch of books about the Civil War. But I think my… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The whole thing about whether you smoke marijuana or not is so ridiculous. That and whether you protested the Vietnam War. Give… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Kakimi chertyami oni viigrali holodnuyu voinu?" This translates roughly to: "How the hell did these people win the Cold War?” — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Proper turkey preparation is critical. According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, more Americans die every year from eating improperly cooked turkey… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Horkman and I are on one side of the ravine, holding our guns over our heads. The Cubans are on the other… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
After the war, Prohibition was passed, and with liquor no longer legally available the nation plunged headlong into the Great Depression. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
During bomb drills, we students were told to crouch under our desks. Apparently the desks used in classrooms in the fifties were… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The United States tried, by depressing the clutch of diplomacy and downshifting the gearshift lever of rhetoric, to remain neutral, but it… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you asked me to name the three scariest threats facing the human race, I would give the same answer that most… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
For a while I got into the South Pacific theater of World War II. I read "American Caesar" by William Manchester, the… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Nobody in the United States knows what either a "meter" or a "kilogram" is. The whole reason why we fought the Cold… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
