Toilets Quotes · Page 5

You spend your whole life trying to get known and then you spend the rest of it hiding in the toilet.

— Bob Fosse

“One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.”

— Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We once installed a $1.49 trap in a woman's toilet and she never had ghost problems again.

— Jason Hawes

The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper…

— Bob Monkhouse

How can you put on a meaningful drama when, every fifteen minutes, proceedings are interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper?

— Rod Serling

Almost 4.25 lakh toilets were built in 2.62 schools nationwide in one year; this gives self-confidence that we can do what we want.

— Narendra Modi

Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls. We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat. George! Only joking, Mum.

— Anonymous

If we all had all we wanted to eat, we'd crap too much. We'd have inflation in the toilet paper industry.

— Jim Thompson

An animal on a leash is not tamed by the owner. The owner is extending himself through the leash to that part…

— Diane Ackerman

All that matters to me is the man in front of me right now. (Tory) I’m not a man, Soteria. (Acheron) I…

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

Mr. Speaker, a new report says only 7% of scientists believe in God. That is right. And the reason they gave was…

— James Traficant

I am a big fan of long drop, composting toilets - I like the cycle of using waste. When you have experienced…

— Kevin McCloud

It took me over a couple of months to find the right piece of transparent paper for a section near the centre,…

— Harold Town

Now, you two – this year, you behave yourselves. If I get one more owl telling me you've – you've blown up…

— Anonymous

“The bathroom appears clean and, thankfully, normal. Although there are two toilets right next to each other. Wait. One is definitely a…

— Kristin Rae

I think people might think, oh, I don't want to approach the big famous author because it's embarrassing, but then they think…

— Augusten Burroughs

I was focused on building things from an early age. When I was about 3, our toilet broke, and my mother was…

— Colin Angle

Freshly brainwashed from rehab, I carry the bottle into the bathroom. I hold it up to the light. See the pretty bottle?…

— Augusten Burroughs

"Our first conversation was on the phone. I was in the bathtub, and I had to tell him that I was in…

— Jennifer Lawrence

The tiny space, the toilet, two hundred strangers just a few inches away, it's so exciting, the lack of room to maneuver,…

— Chuck Palahniuk

I have been photographing our toilet, that glossy enameled receptacle of extraordinary beauty. Here was every sensuous curve of the human figure…

— Edward Weston

A small girl became increasingly paralysed by her parents' frequently violent rows. Sometimes she would spend hours standing completely still in the…

— Sarah Kane

I wondered if the fire had been out to get me. I wondered if all fire was related, like Dad said all…

— Jeannette Walls

The film studios learned to our dismay but to their pleasure that if they spent $200 million making a film they could…

— Woody Allen

I can install toilets. I know all about the wax ring. I can tile floors. I'm learning how to do basic wiring.

— Sandra Bullock

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Sounds to me like he's on the toilet.

— Dana Gould

In many parts of the world, more people have access to a mobile device than to a toilet or running water.

— Nancy Gibbs

What a relief. I didn't have to check the toilet for anything or the light bulbs or the phone. It was just…

— Julia Roberts

The only time I used to regret being a woman was when I had to use the toilets on sets when I…

— Sharmila Tagore

No organization works if the toilets don't work, but I don't believe that finding solutions to business problems is my job.

— James G. March

If a woman were about to proceed to her execution, she would demand a little time to perfect her toilet.

— Nicolas Chamfort

These were people who believed everything about the Soviet Union was perfect, but they were bringing their own toilet paper.

— P. J. O'Rourke

It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.

— George Lindsey

I'm probably more famous for sitting on the toilet than for anything else that I do.

— Frank Zappa

You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.

— Jeff Foxworthy

In 2014, I heard Modi ji speak about toilets. For the first time, I saw a prime minister with such an outlook.…

— Ravi Kishan

The provision of toilets is a minimum requirement for the dignity of our women.

— Narendra Modi

I loved being in Trainspotting and having to dive into the filthiest toilet in Scotland.

— Ewan McGregor

People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

— Billy Connolly

“I’m almost afraid to tell you. Let’s put it this way: clean toilets are the least of your problems in this country.”

— Elle Lothlorien