When my syndicated show got canceled, the next day I still knew how to write jokes. That was a huge revelation. Because… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
But our perfect democracy, which neither needs nor particularly wants voters, is a rarity. It is important to remember there still exist… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I still do not understand how a corporation can have person-hood if it has no soul and never dies. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
By the way, when you finish the bottle of Crown Royal, you can still use the pouch to hold your broken dreams. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom. That's all it is. All those media companies say, "We're… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The next four years, though, you still have to abide by the oversight process that is there to prevent this kind of… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
What are you so mad about? That we still have a government? We still have “traffic lights.” We’re sorry. The government’s not… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
[President Bush] recently challenged Iraqi soldiers still fighting U.S. troops like so: ... 'My answer is bring 'em on.' For those of… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Don't worry, as long as America still has natural resources, you guys are okay. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
After a long investigation the SEC has fined Halliburton $7.5 million for issuing fraudulent statements exaggerating their profits in 1998 and 1999… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You guys (Boko Haram) are trying so hard to convince everybody that you're such badasses. But all you've done with this kidnapping… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
[Doogal] wasn't even animated. It was still and the audience had to move. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The building housing America's military brass is a five-sided pentagon, but somehow, the people in it still manage to make it the… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The government should stop meddling in the business of the farmers, who would actually still be living ina desert if not for… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
![“[President Bush] recently challenged Iraqi soldiers still fighting U.S. troops like so: ... 'My answer is bring 'em on.' For those of you who may be criticizing Bush for acting like a movie cowboy, let me remind you. He's actually acting more like a movie cheerleader.” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/247/jon-stewart-455_acting_president-bush-recently-challenged-iraqi_2046484.jpg)
![“[Doogal] wasn't even animated. It was still and the audience had to move.” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/20a/jon-stewart-455_animated_doogal-wasn-t-even-animated-it-was-still_2671227.jpg)
