You know, it's one thing about intellectuals, they prove that you can be absolutely brilliant and have no idea what's going on. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I know of only six genuine comic geniuses in movie history; Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Groucho Marx & Harpo Marx, Peter Sellers,… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I love baseball. You know, it doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just very beautiful to watch. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. I'm 237 years old, I should be collecting social security. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Some men are heterosexual and some men are bisexual and some men don't think about sex at all ... you know, they… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
It's hard for me to know. I'll think, 'I really brought off my ideas, it's great,' and no one sparks to it — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
As the author you know how you want it to appear on screen and it's always the content dictating the form. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I can live in Paris for four months or London or, you know, Barcelona. These are places that are like New York.… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
When a man is driving in a car and looks out the window and notices a woman with a great body, as… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I don't rely on anybody except my own judgment. I don't get much input. I don't know if that's helped me or… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
The less I speak to the actors, the better. And I always hire great people, and I don't want to impose my… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
See, I will always have this penchant for what I call kamikaze women. I call them kamikazes because they, you know they… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
There's something about my films; they're informed by my sensibility. I have the same preoccupations, the same interests... there's just something in… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Jazz is a big thing with me. It's a very big passion of mine, to play it. I'm an amateur musician and… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Everybody knows how awful the world is and what a terrible situation it is and each person distorts it in a certain… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
When a film is reviled, you open a film and people say "Oh, it's the stupidest thing, it's the worst movie." You… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Retirement is a very subjective thing. There are guys I know who retire and they're very happy and they never miss work… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I've never felt Truth was Beauty. Never. I've always felt that people can't take too much reality. I like being in Ingmar… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
If I was to see any of my films now I would feel, oh god you know it's awful I could do… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I know what I think but I don't know how to put it into words. Maybe I could get a little bit… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
How the hell do I know why there were Nazis? I don't know how the can-opener works. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
My mind can never know my body, although it has become quite friendly with my legs. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Life is unresolved, confusing, bewildering, puzzling, ambiguous. You don't really know what's going to happen. The future is uncertain for everybody. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Everything is controlled by a small evil group to which, unfortunately, no one we know belongs. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
My grammy never gave gifts, you know. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Science is an intellectual dead end, you know? It's a lot of little guys in tweed suits cutting up frogs on foundation… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
My films are misinterpreted all the time. I don't mind that. Everybody's films are misinterpreted. But there's no malice or stupidity in… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What I do know about physics is that to a man standing on the shore, time passes quicker than to a man… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I have no regard for that kind of ceremony. I just don't think they know what they're doing. When you see who… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“True, science has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the moon, and yet when a man of… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate it, and… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What has gotten into you lately? Save a little craziness for menopause! — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I enjoy the making of the film and it's something for me to do. If nobody ever comes to my films, if people don't… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
