Your mama is so stupid, she kept turning left to avoid the wrong turn sign — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I like there to be a joke in practically every photo I take. Nobody has the right to make photography boring. — Norman Parkinson Copy Share Image
You step in with the Seth Rogens of the world, you better have some jokes. — Charlie Hunnam Copy Share Image
“Alec said you do that," said Jace. "Deflect questions about yourself with jokes.” — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes. — Sandra Bernhard Copy Share Image
I'm not even really a joke-teller. I can do ad-lib and banter, but I don't do jokes. — Bruce Forsyth Copy Share Image
You can't do anything to be funny. That's cringeworthy. If your humor comes out of a place of love every time, you… — John Krasinski Copy Share Image
Everybody that's living in this earth is living in a situation. It's not narrow-minded to the point where everybody is serious and… — Mike Epps Copy Share Image
If mankind is naturally good, he is sure going against his nature more and more of the time. It sounds like a… — Herbert Gold Copy Share Image
I think only things that are personal to us offend us. It's always bizarre when people who would normally laugh at an… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
Isn't it strange that a group of very intelligent individuals combined into a political party become collectively stupid? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
She's you, without your conscience, or your feelings. She's you without your humanity." "You're saying she's a mood swing?" He shrugged. "Or… — Derek Landy Copy Share Image
Whenever I walk off the golf course, I thank God that I'm able to tell a joke. I thank God I'm good… — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
Well, let's just call them, uh, Mr. X and Mrs. Y. So anyway, Mr. X would say, 'Marge, if this doesn't get… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“If you ever care to see how all the world’s most awful jokes spread, spend a day on a bond trading desk.… — Michael Lewis Copy Share Image
The why is what makes journalism an adult game. The why is what makes policy coherent and useful. The why is what… — David Simon Copy Share Image
It is a good plan, with a young person of a character to be much affected by ludicrous and absurd representations, to… — Richard Whately Copy Share Image
I think the nerves aspect is a bit of a joke. How hard can it be to walk up and down in… — Edie Campbell Copy Share Image
Most of the time, the songs have jokes in them, little sarcastic things, or purposely kitsch or something. So that's going along… — Paul Simon Copy Share Image
The trouble with the jokes is that once they're written, I know how they're supposed to work, and all I can do… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
The wrong kind of guy to fall in love with is the guy who will let go of the steering wheel as… — An Na Copy Share Image
He'd assumed that you went to school because you had to learn things, starting off with the easy stuff and moving on… — Mary Lawson Copy Share Image
Im not the voice of reason; Im more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke. — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
When I said You look terrific. I really meant Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You can make a movie that's more focused on the jokes, but Young Adult was not that kind of movie. — Kristen Stewart Copy Share Image
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents. — Georg C. Lichtenberg Copy Share Image
The whole westward expansion myth is seen as romantic. But its a joke, a blot on American history. — Frank Waters Copy Share Image
In the whole of the New Testament there is not one joke, that fact alone would invalidate any book. — Friedrich Nietzsche Copy Share Image
There is no such thing as too much fun. People need to know it is O.K. to tell jokes and be happy. — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
The main jokes in this film are about big things, love and life and zombies - we all get that. — Simon Pegg Copy Share Image
Men are simple creatures. 99% of their problems can be solved with sex, sandwiches, or both. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
There are three sides to an argument, your side, my side, and the right side, which is still my side! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I use mother-in-law jokes, kid jokes, tax jokes - anything that works. — Nipsey Russell Copy Share Image
The jokes that take my last name and equate them to a sex act ... is a really cruel thing to do. — Monica Lewinsky Copy Share Image
“Death would be an extremely bad thing like most of us paint it, if being dead were painful.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Too many lives go up in smoke - It's nice to laugh but don't be the joke. — Janet Jackson Copy Share Image
