Now, Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Marketing is so powerful that it can make even an extremely untalented musician a one-hundred-hits wonder.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Monkey will be monkeys little monkeys but if you take their banana they going take yours — MrAwesome Copy Share Image
Like great art, something essential dies when great jokes are explained. So what's the key to telling a good joke/creating great art… — Travis Nichols Copy Share Image
Often when you're filming comedy and you've done six or seven takes, the joke's been done and you know you're gonna have… — Jim Howick Copy Share Image
I don't want people to leave the show being upset. So if I am trying to do a new joke, and sometimes… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
I still feel threatened by academics, but my books have a lot of academic in-jokes and everybody assumes I went to university… — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
I used to tell jokes about Internet-enabled lightbulbs. I can't tell jokes about it anymore - there already is an Internet-connected lightbulb. — Vint Cerf Copy Share Image
A book does not make bad jokes, drink too much or eat more than you can afford to pay for. — Kenneth Turan Copy Share Image
In high school, my friend and I discovered that your cable-access station had to let you do whatever you wanted - it… — Michael Schur Copy Share Image
A human being having a full emotional conversation with a dog is funny, innately. It's one of those things where you get… — Will Smith Copy Share Image
Clive [Oppenheimer] and I figured out that I'm the only one probably in the film industry who is clinically sane. I say… — Werner Herzog Copy Share Image
I used to see a lot of cocaine. There were journalists who used cocaine and didn't write about it and I didn't… — Cameron Crowe Copy Share Image
Failure and unhappiness is easier because you can make a joke out of it. — David Nicholls Copy Share Image
I'd come from the bottom of the barrel. Just Owen Hart getting out of the shadow of Bret Hart's little brother. Everyone… — Owen Hart Copy Share Image
M.I.T.: I had a nervous breakdown this weekend. Have some fries. Caltech: I had three nervous breakdowns this weekend. Have some fries.… — Kevin Copy Share Image
You are doing something over here and over there someone is telling you a joke, or giving you an important piece of… — Michael Ondaatje Copy Share Image
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring… — Horla Copy Share Image
If we live inside a bad joke, it is up to us to learn, at best and worst, to tell it well. — Jonathan Raban Copy Share Image
Whenever I walk off the golf course, I thank God that I'm able to tell a joke. I thank God I'm good… — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
I don't get the animosity when someone tells a joke that you don't like. Whereas if someone made a dish that you… — Brad Williams Copy Share Image
![“Clive [Oppenheimer] and I figured out that I'm the only…” quote by Werner Herzog](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/e24/werner-herzog-964_closest_clive-oppenheimer-and-i-figured-out-that_2885607.jpg)
