Nothing is more characteristically juvenile than contempt for juvenility. . . youth's characteristic chronological snobbery. — C. S. Lewis Copy Share Image
There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after… — Helen Rowland Copy Share Image
Before Kady was born, I didn't think having a kid would be such a big deal. My attitude was simple: Babies are… — Tim Allen Copy Share Image
The brand is lying about something, or at least misrepresenting it. When I read a bottle of shampoo or moisturizer or other… — Aaron Belz Copy Share Image
“Your own shortcomings are the best ground to grow your sense of humor.” — Stu Konigsberg Copy Share Image
The last time I checked, the Constitution said, 'of the people, by the people and for the people.' That's what the Declaration… — William J. Clinton Copy Share Image
Parents, just keep in mind that kids will always round off to the nearest obscenity.. — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
“...clearly, we're supposed to be together. If this were the internet, seventeen-year-old girls would be writing slash fiction about us as we… — Vaughn R. Demont Copy Share Image
“Let me know if you're in any pain, we're going through your groin with a tiny tube up to your heart." Doctor… — Lori Lesko Copy Share Image
Then, at the end of every hand, Miss Bolo would inquire with a dismal countenance and reproachful sigh, why Mr. Pickwick had… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“Why did you buy them? Stop buyin my shit Austin! First the hay, now my horses. Why?” — Kindle Alexander Copy Share Image
My grandfather's a little forgetful, but he likes to give me advice. One day, he took me aside and left me there. — Ron Richards Copy Share Image
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. — W. C. Fields Copy Share Image
“In my opinion, the person who created the torture device called gym class should be clobbered with an enormous frozen cucumber. Not… — Amy Holder Copy Share Image
“The ark was like a portable computer hard drive and Noah was a one-man Geek Squad, and he dumped God's most important… — BikeSnobNYC Copy Share Image
“I like stories about supervillains. They teach children that you can accomplish great things even when the whole world is against you.” — G.D. Falksen Copy Share Image
It is a sad truth, but we have lost the faculty of giving lovely names to things. Names are everything. I never… — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
An absence of antecedents and of relatives is sometimes an aid rather than an impediment to social advancement . . . — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
“The first of ‘Goose’s Two Laws of Survival.’ It runs thus, ‘The weak are meat the strong do eat.’ ” ... Henry grinned… — David Mitchell Copy Share Image
“Miss Green can call a turd a rose if she wants, but that don't mean people's going to be lining up to… — K. Martin Beckner Copy Share Image
