Funny Quotes by Yogi Berra

A nickel ain't worth a dime.

— Yogi Berra

I never said most of the things I said.

— Yogi Berra

I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early.

— Yogi Berra

It was pretty good. Even the music was nice.

— Yogi Berra

Thanks, you don't look so hot yourself.

— Yogi Berra

Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical

— Yogi Berra

If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.

— Yogi Berra

Responding to a question about remarks attributed to him that he did not think were his: "I really didn't say everything I…

— Yogi Berra

Congratulstions on breaking my record. I always thought the record would stand until it was broken.

— Yogi Berra

It ain't like football. You can't make up no trick plays.

— Yogi Berra

I didn't really say everything I said.

— Yogi Berra

It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future.

— Yogi Berra

That's too coincidental to be a coincidence.

— Yogi Berra

He can run anytime he wants. I'm giving him the red light.

— Yogi Berra

When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I…

— Yogi Berra

Ninety percent of putts that are short, don't go in.

— Yogi Berra

I'd find the fellow who lost it [million dollars], and, if he was poor, I'd return it.

— Yogi Berra

When giving directions to Joe Garagiola to his New Jersey home, which is accessible by two routes: "When you come to a…

— Yogi Berra

Never answer anonymous letters.

— Yogi Berra

I can't concentrate when I'm thinking.

— Yogi Berra

I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!

— Yogi Berra

I don't know (if they were men or women running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads.

— Yogi Berra

I don't know, I'm not in shape yet.

— Yogi Berra

Third ain't so bad if nothin' is hit to you.

— Yogi Berra

I'd say he's done more than that.

— Yogi Berra