Funny Quotes by Nikhil Saluja · Page 35

LOVE, Consists of happiness, given back and forth;

— Nikhil Saluja

When it comes to sex and phone calls, I have mastered the art of keeping them under a few minutes.

— Nikhil Saluja

Well. That wasn't worth it. - Our parents

— Nikhil Saluja

I'm trying to fix your mother's camera. Easy, easy - Hmmm. I think I need a bigger drill.

— Nikhil Saluja

Acupuncture : . . . a jab well done.

— Nikhil Saluja

WIFE, A woman who, in the same breath, can complain she has nothing to wear, and is bemoaning she needs more closet…

— Nikhil Saluja

I wish people would learn from their mistakes and not keep making the same exact ones, damaging themselves.

— Nikhil Saluja

On his daughter's diaper: There was so much poop. It didn't look like a baby's poop. It looked like a 55-year-old alcoholic…

— Nikhil Saluja

I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.

— Nikhil Saluja

A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation.

— Nikhil Saluja

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

— Nikhil Saluja

Steps into shower. Then turns the water on.

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVER(S), A person who could only be more perfect if your partner turned into a pizza at 4:00 am

— Nikhil Saluja

STOREROOM: The distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.

— Nikhil Saluja

I dont have commitment issues, I been buying the same brand of whiskey for 8 years

— Nikhil Saluja

Love makes the world go round, but alcohol makes it go round twice as fast.

— Nikhil Saluja

One girl's Ewww is another girl's way to get followers.

— Nikhil Saluja

Nephew: I'm leaving the house in NEPHEW minutes.

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, The alliance of two people, one who never remembers birthdays, and the other who never forgets them;

— Nikhil Saluja

Gasp Reflex : The reaction of a new father when he sees the new mother's breasts.

— Nikhil Saluja

The bandage was wound around the wound.

— Nikhil Saluja

You don't understand me and never will, so don't start that shit about knowing how I feel.

— Nikhil Saluja

Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back, unless your tears smell like dog food.

— Nikhil Saluja

That moment when you have to beg yourself to stop crying and tell yourself, 'Be Strong'

— Nikhil Saluja

Site Engineer is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

— Nikhil Saluja