You know you've drank too much when you actually ask your wife to drive you home. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
How about this, you remove Funny/Model from your bio and let me be the judge of that. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe: Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
He'll never be better than he is on the first date. Unless he's rich and hasn't told you yet. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm well aware when i've to use suck me or fuck me. Yea I'm classy like that! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
People usually say Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Personally, I find it's in big boobs. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Million dollar idea for a sci-fic movie: A world just like ours but with one key difference. When your phone dies, YOU… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Etc: The word that makes people think you are smarter than you really are. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My girlfriend told me I'm awful in bed. I don't know how she can tell in 30 seconds. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Who are you? Why am I here? I want answers now or I want them eventually! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes you just have to sit down and ask your parents if they sold your soul. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you push your brother down the stairs, he will become your step brother. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share