Dakota Quote by Garrison Keillor

“Jesus said the meek would inherit the earth, but so far all we've gotten is Minnesota and North Dakota.”

Garrison Keillor

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 2.7 out of 5 (7 ratings)

Dakota Earth Jesus Meek Minnesota Nature North dakota Said

More by Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.

Garrison Keillor

Image

The socially redeeming aspect of golf lies in the vast number of lawyers and bankers and managers who play it, and when you think…

Garrison Keillor

Image

God plays a lot of jokes on us to get our attention.

Garrison Keillor

Image

Ha! Easy for nuns to talk about giving up things. That's what they do for a living.

Garrison Keillor

Image

This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.

Garrison Keillor

Image

Before the world was made, when it was only darkness and mist and waters, God was well aware of Lake Wobegon, my family, our…

Garrison Keillor

Image

On investments, 1998: Where I'm from we don't trust paper. Wealth is what's here on the premises. If I open a cupboard and see,…

Garrison Keillor

Image

“The rich can afford to be progressive. Poor people have reason to be afraid of the future.”

Garrison Keillor

Image

English is the perfect language for preachers because it allows you to talk until you think of what to say.

Garrison Keillor

Image

“If you can't read a simple goddam sign and follow one simple goddam instruction then get your fat butt the hell out of here.”

Garrison Keillor

Image

“The Gospel is meant to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.”

Garrison Keillor

Image

I don't want them to be told to remember me.

Garrison Keillor

Image

Explore all 304 Garrison Keillor quotes

More Dakota quotes

Imposing excessive new regulations, or closing coal-fired power plants, would produce few health or environmental benefits. But it would exact huge costs on society…

Paul Driessen

Image

I don't think the folks in the low-tax states really want to go into a fairness discussion. Residents of Connecticut and New York would…

Gail Collins

Image

I love working in television, and I've been thrilled to be a part of so many wonderful shows. I worked with Lady Gaga on…

Erich Bergen

Image

I always thought of myself as a good old South Dakota boy who grew up here on the prairie,

George McGovern

Image

In 1988, as an unknown candidate, totally unknown, I won Iowa, came in second in New Hampshire, won South Dakota. I was ahead in…

Dick Gephardt

Image

I always thought of myself as a good old South Dakota boy who grew up here on the prairie. My dad was a Methodist…

George McGovern

Image

When I was a youngster growing up in South Dakota, we never referred to the national debt, it was always referred to as the…

George McGovern

Image

What's getting all the attention is we have South Dakota putting out this direct frontal attack. I'm actually just as concerned about what they're…

Anonymous

Image

You can only look forward to a South Dakota winter if, as with childbirth, remodeling a house, or writing a novel, you're able to…

Dan O'Brien

Image

I think that there was a lot of undisclosed money that came into South Dakota, driving a message to paint me as a Washington…

Anonymous

Image

Dakota tribal wisdom says that when you're on a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount. Of course, there are other strategies. You…

Gary Hamel

Image

I would love to work with Marion Cotillard... and my sister! I've never worked with Dakota before in a movie. It'd be so cool…

Elle Fanning

Image

Browse all 99 Dakota quotes

Dakota Quote by Garrison Keillor

Related quotes

More by Garrison Keillor

More Dakota quotes