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Louis C. K.'s Page
Masturbate Quotes by Louis C. K.
1 Masturbate quote by Louis C. K.
More Quotes by Louis C. K.
Louis C. K. has 184 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:
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I found out that I'm a pretty bad father. I make a lot of mistakes and I don't know what I'm doing.…
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When my kids were younger, I used to avoid them. I used to sit on the toilet 'til my legs fell asleep.…
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Fathers have skills that they never use at home. You run a landscaping business and you can't dress and feed a four-year-old?…
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People say there's delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours, that used to take 30 years, a…
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People come back from flights and tell you a story like it's a horror story. That's how bad they make it sound.…
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Spend time with your kids and have your own ideas about what they need. It won't take away your manhood; it will…
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...Then I got divorced and everything changed, and I became a father in a whole new way and found a whole new…
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When you're a father in a marriage, you sort of become the mother's assistant. And you sort of get a list from…
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One thing I learned from drinking is that if you ever go Christmas caroling, you should go with a group of people.…
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How do women still go out guys, when you consider that there is no greater threat to women than men? We're the…
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There's a reason it's called 'girls gone wild' and not 'women gone wild'. When girls go wild, they show their tits. When…
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You know what, it's not your life, it's life. Life is bigger than you, if you can imagine that. Life isn't something…
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More Masturbate Quotes
Popular Masturbate quotes from across the collection:
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Be strong, believe in freedom and in God, love yourself, understand your sexuality, have a sense of humor, masturbate, don't judge people…
— Madonna Ciccone
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If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.
— George Carlin
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Every time I talk to a fancy journalist and they ask what I do in my free time my scumbag brain goes…
— Anna Kendrick
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If I want low-impact aerobics, I'll masturbate. If I want high-impact aerobics, I'll masturbate again.
— Dennis Miller
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If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I'd go to one of Jonah Hill's pool parties.
— Amy Poehler
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I'm very romantic when I masturbate. Sometimes I light a candle...then I try and shoot it out. It's like a carnival.
— Dave Attell
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I want to make a movie that has enough impact that it's going to do what it needs to do. But I…
— David Fincher
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The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery. So you can't masturbate without lust.
— Christine O'Donnell
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It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be abstinent alone. The Bible says that lust…
— Christine O'Donnell
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We know that more than seventy to eighty percent of women masturbate, and ninety percent of men masturbate, and the rest lie.
— Joycelyn Elders
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I was stuck in traffic one day and just kinda thought it would be funny to masturbate. It was sunny and clear…
— Zach Braff
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Unlike the millions who casually masturbate in solitude while looking at girlie pictures in Playboy and similar magazines, the massage man preferred…
— Gay Talese
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