« All Like Quotes · Demetri Martin's Page
Like Quotes by Demetri Martin
- I think that when you get dressed in the morning, sometimes you're really making a decision about your behavior for the day. Like if you…
- I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the…
- I like video games, but they are very violent. I want to create a video game in which you have to help all the characters…
- I like fruit baskets because it gives you the ability to mail someone a piece of fruit without appearing insane. Like, if someone just mailed…
- I like to use 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' on my toast in the morning, because sometimes when I eat breakfast, I like to…
- I noticed that there are no B batteries. I think that's to avoid confusion, cause if there were you wouldn't know if someone was stuttering.…
- I keep a lighter in my back pocket all the time. I'm not a smoker, I just really like certain songs.
- A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just…
- A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little…
- I started being a comedy fan when I was, I'm going to guess, like 5 or 6 years old.
- I think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom note on your computer, if the paper clip popped up and said, 'Looks…
- Stand-up is like a row boat: it's fun and romantic when you're choosing to do it. But if you have no other choice than to…
- There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less…
- I love catching a snapshot of something that is just about to happen. Or maybe something that just happened, you know. But I like especially…
- The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright, like just always as a comedic actor. I always liked Gary Larson, who's really funny…
- Sometimes I use my jokes as building blocks for larger bits. I like to draw and play music, so sometimes I do those things along…
- It feels like every day or two, people on Twitter and the Internet are outraged about something.
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- Actually I am very glad that people can buy Armani - even if it's a fake. I like the fact that I'm… — Giorgio Armani
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- What annoys the hell out of me is the arrogance of some people. They don't even listen to our music, they decided… — Billie Joe Armstrong
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- I'd love to go to art school. I'd love to learn how to draw. I'd love to be fluent in Spanish. I'd… — Billie Joe Armstrong
- I don't like LA. The majority just seem to be so artificial. Look at how they worship everything they think is fashionable.… — Billie Joe Armstrong
- Minority is about being an individual. It's like you have to sift through the darkness to find your place and be that… — Billie Joe Armstrong