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Guests Quotes by Jack Handey
- You know what's probably a good thing to hang on your porch in the summertime, to keep mosquitoes away from you and your guests? Just…
- When the chairman introduced the guest speaker as a former illegal alien, I got up from my chair and yelled, "What's the matter, no jobs…
More Guests Quotes
- Jews have God's promise and if we Christians have it, too, then it is only as those chosen with them, as guests… — Karl Barth
- I like to go to anybody else's birthday, and if I'm invited I'm a good guest. But I never celebrate my birthdays.… — Mikhail Baryshnikov
- Humility is a virtue, and it is a virtue innate in guests. — Max Beerbohm
- One might well say that mankind is divisible into two great classes: hosts and guests. — Max Beerbohm
- People are either born hosts or born guests. — Max Beerbohm
- The main prank that we play with props is for people's birthdays. The special effects people will put a little explosive in… — Catherine Bell
- We see our customers as invited guests to a party, and we are the hosts. It's our job every day to make… — Jeff Bezos
- What is there more kindly than the feeling between host and guest? — Aeschylus
- I always knew I would sing. I just didn't know if I would be successful or not. But I sang at school,… — Andrea Bocelli
- Do you know what you call those who use towels and never wash them, eat meals and never do the dishes, sit… — Erma Bombeck
- House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad. — Erma Bombeck
- Regular panelists on shows can be terrifying. They own that space, and many guest comics suspect they are favoured in the edit,… — Jo Brand