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Funny Quotes by Elayne Boosler
- I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how…
- When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.
- I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.
- When the sun comes up, I have morals again.
- Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?
- My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask for directions.
- I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.
- I always had a running commentary in my head that was extremely funny and off-center, but I never said it to anyone.
- I wasn't funny as a kid. I remember enjoying comedians, but I never understood it was a job choice or a profession.
- I've thought for the last decade or so, the only actual place raw truth was seeping through in newspapers was on the Comics Pages. They…
- We have women in the military, but they don't put us in the front lines. They don't know if we can fight, if we can…
- When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping.
More Funny Quotes
- To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would be enough… — Hannah Arendt
- These are the fifties, you know. The disgusting, posturing fifties. — Hannah Arendt
- I'm literally open to any medium that will have me. — J. J. Abrams
- We must all make peace so that we can all live in peace. — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- There is no great genius without a mixture of madness. — Aristotle
- I hope to make movies that are so small they don't need to make anything to be profitable. — J. J. Abrams
- I love recording music. — J. J. Abrams
- Hope is the dream of a waking man. — Aristotle
- Education is the best provision for old age. — Aristotle
- I've had the same friends since I was in kindergarten. — J. J. Abrams
- I also have this incredible love for women. — Kevyn Aucoin