« All Comedy Quotes · Jerry Seinfeld's Page
Comedy Quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
- Nothing in life is fun for the whole family. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry.
- Success is the enemy of comedy.
- Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.
- I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the…
- Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
- My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.
- The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk like you because…
- You know, crankiness is at the essence of all comedy.
- There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think,…
- Well, all comedy starts with anger. You get angry, and its never for a good reason, right? You know its not a good reason. And…
- I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
- It takes up enough of my time and interest just working on comedy. I just enjoy it and love doing it.
- I know there are kids out there, I want to make sure they all know that driving without braking is not something I recommend, unless…
More Comedy Quotes
- Don't get me wrong, there are sometimes if I go and see a really funny comedy, that I wished I had smoked… — Stephen Baldwin
- In terms of the romantic kind of lead, I just never enjoy those movies very much. Maybe they'll come to interest me… — Christian Bale
- One of my favorite things about 'Star Trek' wasn't just the overt banter but the humor in that show about the relationships… — J. J. Abrams
- When I was a kid, among the other embarrassing things I would do, and there's a list of stupid things, but I… — J. J. Abrams
- Comedy, drama, Westerns, sci-fi... it's all fine if the story's compelling and the character is interesting to me. I do like action… — Jensen Ackles
- I will never say never, but I will say never to doing the more typical romantic comedies. You know, unless I'm getting… — Christian Bale
- I try to do women's-point-of-view comedy. The joke is, 'This is what I think; there's the truth.' I try to think of… — Roseanne Barr
- I would call it a comedy variety show. We have some people just doing straight standup. We usually try to have one… — Todd Barry