“A blanket can be a meditation device. If the blanket is white, and you stare at it, you can blank out your… — Jarod Kintz Meditation Copy Share Image
“Everybody thinks they’re a prophet. They must, or nobody would get married. Or maybe at a 50% divorce rate, only half the… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“On a clear day I can see NYC. I just have to turn on the TV.” — Jarod Kintz Clear day Copy Share Image
“Never chew off the hand you write with, you might survive and have to sign autographs.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I tried to wear my shirt while it was still on the hanger. That’s just the kind of morning person I am… — Jarod Kintz Morning Copy Share Image
“Those who seek the Truth are logically in the dark. Therefore, if I aspire to be anything in the world, it's to… — Jarod Kintz Seek The Truth Copy Share Image
“In the name of freedom and redistribution of wealth, I’ve decided to grow a beard on my chest.” — Jarod Kintz Freedom Copy Share Image
“I’ll name my town “Unwelcome,” and the sign will say, “Welcome to Unwelcome.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Spiders are my kryptonite. Also, neon green crystals are my kryptonite. ” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’ll write something that’s 111% true. It’ll be so true that it’ll be 100% false.” — Jarod Kintz Writing Copy Share Image
“Because even among contrarians, I’m a contrarian. But all of this is just words of bronze, third place rhetoric. What do I… — Jarod Kintz Reading writing Copy Share Image
“I put my deodorant on like I’m painting my armpits with a paintbrush. Art is everywhere and in everything—especially love.” — Jarod Kintz Art Copy Share Image
“I have a great golf swing. I just wish I had someone to push me on it.” — Jarod Kintz Golf swing Copy Share Image
“Escalators are the offspring of elevators and stairs. Love is the progeny of passion and admiration.” — Jarod Kintz Love Copy Share Image
“Conspiracy theorists like to claim NASA’s moon landing was faked. Well of course it was! But the biggest conspiracy of all is… — Jarod Kintz Moon landing Copy Share Image
“I feel like the boy who cried wolf, even though I know even less about politics.” — Jarod Kintz Politics Copy Share Image
“If you asked me to mow your lawn, I’d say sure—just as soon as you move your lawn directly above mine.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If I ask you, “What about love?”, there is no wrong answer. Unless you answered 34. That is definitely wrong.” — Jarod Kintz Love Copy Share Image
“The morning grass was damp and cool with dew. My yellow rain slicker must have looked sharp contrasted against the bright green… — Jarod Kintz Better place Copy Share Image
“My stomach’s upset. I must have accidentally said something to insult it.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“No matter how bad things get, just keep looking up. Just keep looking up her skirt. Or his kilt.” — Jarod Kintz Bad thing Copy Share Image
“Who I am is unimportant. But who I am is very important. I’ll suppress my ego now, every occurring now, so I… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The commodity I sell is nonsense. Condiments sold separately. Ah, but that’s life, no?” — Jarod Kintz Life Copy Share Image
“I haven’t had a birthday party in a while, probably because I’m not really into celebrating myself. Especially not for an achievement… — Jarod Kintz Birthday Copy Share Image
