I was born at a very early age. Before I had time to regret it, I was four and a half years… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
It isn't so much that hard times are coming; the change observed is mostly soft times going. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
“From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend on reading… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important,… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
He [Groucho's father] had absolutely no training, and if you had ever seen one of his suits, you'd realize what an accurate statement that… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Why would I want to join an organization that would encourage people like myself to become members. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
The only game I like to play is "Old Maid", providing she's not too old — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you something. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
![“He [Groucho's father] had absolutely no training, and if you had ever seen one of his suits, you'd realize what an accurate statement that is. You see, Pop never used a tape measure. He didn't believe in it. He said he could just look at a man and tell hi.” quote by Groucho Marx](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/02f/groucho-marx-788_accurate_he-groucho-s-father-had-absolutely-no-tr_22161.jpg)
