She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Life lives, life dies. Life laughs, life cries. Life gives up and life tries. But life looks different through everyone's eyes. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
I'm not much of a correspondent. My letters are not only uninteresting but sparse. I'm glad I don?t have to write for… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
He [Groucho's father] had absolutely no training, and if you had ever seen one of his suits, you'd realize what an accurate statement that… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Why would I want to join an organization that would encourage people like myself to become members. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
The only game I like to play is "Old Maid", providing she's not too old — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you something. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
![“He [Groucho's father] had absolutely no training, and if you had ever seen one of his suits, you'd realize what an accurate statement that is. You see, Pop never used a tape measure. He didn't believe in it. He said he could just look at a man and tell hi.” quote by Groucho Marx](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/02f/groucho-marx-788_accurate_he-groucho-s-father-had-absolutely-no-tr_22161.jpg)
