Tom DeLay may or may not have broken campaign finance laws, but he did his best to look like he was breaking… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Everybody in America who didn't come over the Bering Strait ice bridge stole his land from somebody else. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Like most sensible people, you probably lost interest in modern art about the time that Julian Schnabel was painting broken pieces of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
'You're stupid,' is not something even his most severe critics usually say to President Barack Obama. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Bill Clinton is not a hypocrite. If a man believes that it is just and moral to redistribute wealth, there is nothing… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In Henry Adams, I discovered not only the prototype of the modern thinker but also someone who is more interesting: a viper-toothed,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
It could be that all awful dictators are frustrated artists - Mao with his poetry and Mussolini with his monuments. Stalin was… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Children live in the only successful Marxist state ever created: the family. 'From each according to his ability, to each according to… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Adam Smith is misread as being amoral precisely because people don't read his first book, because they don't read 'The Theory of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Death is so important that God visited death upon his own son, thereby helping us learn right from wrong well enough that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Writing on a computer makes saving what's been written too easy. Pretentious lead sentences are kept, not tossed. Instead of sitting surrounded… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
A deadly sins addendum is long overdue. Life has changed since Pope Gregory the Great scribbled his initial list in the sixth… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Accuse a person of breaking all Ten Commandments, and you've written the promo blurb for the dust cover of his tell-all memoir. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'm too tough and sensitive to have to have some pubescent twerp with his mom's earring in his tongue, who combs his… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In comparative terms, there's no poverty in America by a long shot. Heritage Foundation political scientist Robert Rector has worked up figures showing that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
So-called Western Civilization, as practised in half of Europe, some of Asia and a few parts of North America, is better than anything else… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
It was Ronald Reagan who used to say that the 10 most frightening words in the English language are, "I'm from the federal government,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Pete Seeger is a modest, unassuming, cheerful, and kind-natured man. He's a good folk singer, if you can stand folk singing. And he's such… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
