Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Me? Behave? Seriously!! As a child I saw Tarzan almost naked, Cinderella arrived home after midnight, Pinocchio told lies, Aladdin was a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you see a guy opening a car door for a girl, its one of two things, either a new girl, or… — Jorge Armenta Copy Share Image
I just got engaged. My fiancée won't take my name because Lisa Levin sounds awful. So she's just going to remain Lisa… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My friend said he didn't have time for Twitter like me, he has a job I replied shut the fuck up &… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Slap a player, stomp a bitch; they both ain't nothing but some nasty tricks. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Guys, if you keep a you-know-what in your wallet, it's only good for a month or two. So, out with the old,… — Alec Straub Copy Share Image
When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power - like God must feel when he's holding… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you are alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you predict the end of the world and nothing happens :P — Me Copy Share Image
I read the newspaper every day just to see if there's anyone I know in the obituaries or the underwear ads. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
She watch Titanic for the love story. I watch it for one scene with boobs. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I am thinking to write a book about facebook people psychology, so at least people like me can understand, why some people… — Rajesh Copy Share Image
Girl Logic: Maybe if I wear this shirt that shows my boobs I'll meet a nice guy who wants me for my… — Seth Rogan Copy Share Image
Why the Fuck is TeamLesbian Or TeamBi almost In every Girls Bio on Twitter?.. Where the Fuck is TeamILIkeLonnngggggDick ?? — Jerett Parker Copy Share Image
Blonde and Brunette r walking on the road.brunette says Look, a dead bird. Blonde looks up in the sky, WHERE, WHERE? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Hey autocorrect, stop messing with my damn curse words. You mother forklift. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
About 90% of the high scores in mobile games are made either in the toilet or in a lecture or while preparing… — Punkinhead Abhishek Copy Share Image
