What I like about masturbation is that you don't have to…

If you have ever done any security work - and it did not involve the concept of "network of trust" - it wasn't security…

— Linus Torvalds

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it.

— Truman Capote

I'm a promoter of masturbation. Don't sleep around...learn yourself first! Guys do it, but girls don't. They should.

— Taylor Momsen

I think that at a certain age, say fifteen or sixteen, poetry is like masturbation. But later in life good poets burn their early…

— Umberto Eco

Sleeping with an ex is like masturbation. You know you're f*cking yourself but you do it anyway.

— Anonymous

The act of writing itself is done in secret, like masturbation.

— Stephen King

Procrasination is like masturbation. In the end you are just screwing yourself

— Anonymous

“Procrastination is like masturbation, in the beginning it feels good, but in the end, you're just f***ing yourself!”

— Michael McCarthy

Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you're the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in…

— Bob Saget

Contempt for others, like masturbation, is best as a secret pleasure.

— Mason Cooley

Bouldering is like masturbation: not as good as the real thing but you don't need to worry about your protection.

— Scott Grimes

shopping for clothes is like masturbation - everyone does it, but it isn't very interesting and therefore should be done alone, in an embarrassed…

— Lorrie Moore

LIFE is like MASTURBATION, its all in YOUR HANDS

— Archie Fuentes

“Procrastination is like masturbation: it's fun for awhile, but in the end, you're only screwing yourself.”

— Lauren Kunze

Writing a book is like masturbation, and making a movie is like an orgy.

— Clive Barker