Day Quote by Steven Wright Download Open image “One day a guy tried to rob me on the street, and I had no money. So I charged him.” — Steven Wright ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.1 out of 5 (5 ratings) Copy quoteShare Day Guy Me Money No money One day Street Streets
I didn't actually rob anyone but once I was kidnapped by two older boys for half a day and they were trying to get… — Ashley Walters Copy Share Image
When I was in the U.S., I was caught by the cops for speeding and charged a fine of 200 dollars. I didn't have… — Karthi Copy Share Image
I let some blind guy borrow money the other day. He said he was gonna pay me back the next time he saw me…Wait… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A man in Michigan stole nearly 250 empty beer cans from a 7-11 store and then told police that his crack cocaine habit drove… — Seth Meyers Copy Share Image
It wasn't right to have someone charge into you your world without even asking, acting as if you were nothing more than an egg… — Alice Hoffman Copy Share Image
If you attempt to beat a man down and to get his goods for less than a fair price, you are attempting to commit… — Henry Ward Beecher Copy Share Image
Anyway, I lived on the streets and did pretty good until I got caught stealing, what was it? I kicked in a restaurant window,… — Gregory Corso Copy Share Image
I had a gentleman steal or 'misplace' - I guess I should say 'allegedly' - a lot of money from me. It didn't make… — Baron Vaughn Copy Share Image
One night I asked a cabbie to take me where the action is, he took me to my house. — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
What is a man if he is not a thief who openly charges as much as he can for the goods he sells? — Mahatma Gandhi Copy Share Image
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked,… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Nobody can really compare a relationship in which the victim is 15 years old to one where she's 6. While both criminal, they're very different circumstances. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
It's very intense to be in front of a live audience. It's just an amazing experience. It's dangerous. Everything out there is heightened. The… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Babies don't need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room.” — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
When I'm on stage, it's really intense. My mind is going a million miles an hour, trying to remember my act, trying to say… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
I don't like politicians, and I don't like politics. I definitely don't want to be associated with any of them. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
On Sundays, that's my pig out day and I do the pizza and the beer. — Victoria Silvstedt Copy Share Image
I don't drink much anymore, but when I traveled with Frank Sinatra, God rest his soul, I used to drink like I could do… — Don Rickles Copy Share Image
I would borrow money all day long, if the cost of borrowing is less than the expected return. — Brad Schneider Copy Share Image
I had developed a relationship with one of the anti-abortion sidewalk counselors who stood in front of my facility. We talked regularly through the… — Abby Johnson Copy Share Image
I loved the game so much that even though our playing field was muddy and we had many trees on it, I used to… — Roberto Clemente Copy Share Image
Television, radio, social media. The 24/7 news cycle plows forward mercilessly on our desks, in our cars and in our pockets. Thousands and thousands… — Joseph Prince Copy Share Image
I am tired of our characters being so incomplete. When do we ever save the day in a film? When does a Latino actor… — Esai Morales Copy Share Image
I want to make my music and be a happy woman, a good wife, a good mom and one day hopefully have a child… — LeAnn Rimes Copy Share Image
Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. — Emma McLaughlin Copy Share Image
One day I woke up and Juventus wanted me, another Manchester United and what I know is that there were approaches made. But an… — Raul Jimenez Copy Share Image
I think naturally I've been kind of a lead-by-doing guy. Just showing up to work every day. You never ask teammates something you wouldn't… — Terrell Suggs Copy Share Image
For 11 straight years, I woke up pretty much every single day with nothing to do unless I created something to do. — Matt Rife Copy Share Image
