« All Your Lap Quotes · Jack Handey's Page
Your Lap Quotes by Jack Handey
More Your Lap Quotes
- Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap. — Doug Larson
- How do you summon up courage to dismiss a cat who is paying you a compliment of sitting on your lap? — Derek Tangye
- Customers should complain more. You know, food's expensive nowadays. And these sommeliers come along with their thousand-page wine list and practically throw… — Gordon Ramsay
- If you're at a Thanksgiving dinner, but you don't like the stuffing or the cranberry sauce or anything else, just pretend like… — Jack Handey
- Everyone thinks something like 'The Hills' just falls into your lap. It's not true. You have to work for everything. — Brody Jenner
- When an eighty-five pound mammal licks your tears away, then tries to sit on your lap, it's hard to feel sad. — Kristan Higgins
- You can pray until you faint, but unless you get up and try to do something, God is not going to put… — Fannie Lou Hamer
- Cats, I always think, only jump into your lap to check if you are cold enough, yet, to eat. — Anne Enright
- ...every once in a while it seems like the cosmos part and something great plops into your lap, that's how it was… — Don Felder
- I believe in destiny. But I also believe that you can’t just sit back and let destiny happen. A lot of times,… — Spike Lee
- Don't wait till you're older, or in some better job than you have now. Don't wait for anything. Don't wait till some… — Ira Glass
- It's all about the work. Nothing is going to fall into your lap. — Russell Simmons