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Say Quotes by George Carlin
- If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very…
- People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
- If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense? What year did Jesus think it was?
- They mention that it's a nonstop flight. Well, I must say I don't care for that sort of thing. Call me old fashioned, but I…
- And this should go without saying. That's why I'm going to say it: Drinking and driving don't mix. Do your drinking early in the morning…
- In Hawaii they say, "aloha." That's a nice one, It means both "hello" and "good-bye" Which just goes to show, if you spend enough time…
- Like on the airlines, they say they want to 'pre-board'. Well, what the hell is 'pre board'? What does that mean? To get on before…
- Things I wonder about the FBI's list of the "Ten Most Wanted" criminals: When they catch a guy and he comes off the list, does…
- Sometimes guys'll say to you, 'Have a good one'. I say, 'I already have a good one. Now I'm looking for a longer one'.
- Religion - religion, at best - at BEST - is like a lift in your shoe. If you need it for a while, and it…
- And what can we do to silence these Christian athletes who thank Jesus whenever they win, never mention his name when they lose? Not a…
- It's the old American Double Standard, ya know: Say one thing, do somethin' different. And of course this country is founded on the double standard.…
- So about 80 years after the Constitution is ratified, the slaves are freed. Not so you'd really notice it of course; just kinda on paper.…
- When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
- When people say “clean as a whistle”, they forget that a whistle is full of spit.
- The habits of liberals, their automatic language, their knee-jerk responses to certain issues, deserved the epithets the right wing stuck them with. I'd see how…
- In TV today, you can say I pricked my finger, but you can't say it the other way around.
- Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
- People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several hours, while the…
- So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” And anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside…
- Here's a phrase that apparently the airlines simply made up: near miss. They say that if 2 planes almost collide, it's a near miss. Bullshit,…
- Pardon me I've got nothing to say.
- They say that instead of cursing the darkness, one should light a candle. Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.
- Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've…
- If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?
More Ways to Read Say Quotes by George Carlin
More Say Quotes
- With a goose-quill and a few sheets of paper, I mock myself of the universe. They say I am the son of… — Pietro Aretino
- Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever. — Aristophanes
- I will undoubtedly have to seek what is happily known as gainful employment, which I am glad to say does not describe… — Dean Acheson
- Live never to be ashamed if anything you say or do is published around the world, even if what is said is… — Richard Bach
- I would definitely say the Oakland Raiders are the punk rock band of football. — Billie Joe Armstrong
- Compassion is not a popular virtue. Very often when I talk to religious people, and mention how important it is that compassion… — Karen Armstrong
- My mom was such a strong character. I don't want to say she was like a man, but she was tough. — Lance Armstrong
- I can honestly say - and it's a big surprise to me - that I have never had a dream about being… — Neil Armstrong
- I grew up in a working-class family, so I guess you could say I write from what I know. — Andrea Arnold
- I try to live my life where I end up at a point where I have no regrets. So I try to… — Darren Aronofsky
- Writing comes more easily if you have something to say. — Sholem Asch
- We must have a theme, a goal, a purpose in our lives. If you don't know where you're aiming, you don't have… — Mary Kay Ash