"Why do we say something is out of…" — George Carlin

"Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?"

— George Carlin

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546 Quotes by George Carlin

George Carlin has 546 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is…
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why…
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set…
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it…
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then…
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.

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More Funny Quotes

This quote is filed under Funny Quotes, one of 52,060 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would… — Hannah Arendt
These are the fifties, you know. The disgusting, posturing fifties. — Hannah Arendt
I'm literally open to any medium that will have me. — J. J. Abrams
We must all make peace so that we can all live in peace. — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
There is no great genius without a mixture of madness. — Aristotle
I hope to make movies that are so small they don't need to make anything to be profitable. — J. J. Abrams
I love recording music. — J. J. Abrams
Hope is the dream of a waking man. — Aristotle
Education is the best provision for old age. — Aristotle
I've had the same friends since I was in kindergarten. — J. J. Abrams
I also have this incredible love for women. — Kevyn Aucoin

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