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How Quotes by Steven Wright
- Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen.
- If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
- Ever notice how irons have a setting for permanent press? I don't get it.
- I live on a one-way street that's also a dead end. I'm not sure how I got there.
- How young can you die of old age?
- Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.'
- What I like about the jokes, to me it's a lot of logic, no matter how crazy they are. It has to make absolute sense,…
- I'm standing behind a wall of jokes. You don't know about my personal life, my girlfriends, or what I do when I'm not on the…
- I liked school, but I used to dread those moments when the teacher would call me up to give an oral report. I forced myself…
- When I'm on stage, it's really intense. My mind is going a million miles an hour, trying to remember my act, trying to say it…
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- I am, indeed, a king, because I know how to rule myself. — Pietro Aretino
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- That said, the question remains: how to strike the balance between free speech and mutual respect in this mixed-up world, both blessed… — Timothy Garton Ash
- There's nothing wrong with being a loser, it just depends on how good you are at it. — Billie Joe Armstrong
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