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Guy Quotes by Steven Wright
- I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign…
- When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
- I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.
- I thought I would be a guy on the radio.
- One day a guy tried to rob me on the street, and I had no money. So I charged him.
- Very rarely do I talk off the top of my head on stage. I'm not an improv guy. I'm a writer-guy who presents what he's…
- I'm standing behind a wall of jokes. You don't know about my personal life, my girlfriends, or what I do when I'm not on the…
- I worked in a health food store once. A guy asked me, 'If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?
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