The purpose of sports - even foreign sports - is not to bore people. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
That happy sense of purpose people have when standing up for a principle they haven't really been knocked down for yet. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The purpose of the Senate is to keep 100 middle aged knuckleheads out of the private sector where they can do real harm. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The real purpose of welfare is to get rid of poor people entirely. Everybody knows welfare has bad effects; that's the point. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
America's public schools have served their purpose. Free and compulsory education was good for a somewhat unpromising young nation. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
If ever there were a place where people not only tend not to face economic facts, but it's almost their purpose not… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The inherent purpose of American government is let people seek their own goals and to encourage them to be responsible on the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The purpose of a funeral service is to comfort the living. It is important at a funeral to display excessive grief. This… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Of course, no one wants to ban the vote. Voting should remain available for sporting and recreational purposes. But certain types of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In comparative terms, there's no poverty in America by a long shot. Heritage Foundation political scientist Robert Rector has worked up figures showing that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
So-called Western Civilization, as practised in half of Europe, some of Asia and a few parts of North America, is better than anything else… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
It was Ronald Reagan who used to say that the 10 most frightening words in the English language are, "I'm from the federal government,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Pete Seeger is a modest, unassuming, cheerful, and kind-natured man. He's a good folk singer, if you can stand folk singing. And he's such… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
