Although humans tend to view sex as mainly a fun recreational activity sometimes resulting in death, in nature it is a far… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
With a novel, you have to have a story. It's much more important to have it matter to the reader what happens… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
We travel because, no matter how comfortable we are at home, there's a part of us that wants - that needs -… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
As you get older; you've probably noticed that you tend to forget things. You'll be talking with somebody at a party, and… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I’ve noticed that one thing about parents is that no matter what stage your child is in, the parents who have older… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I've come to realize that you're going to get criticized no matter what. Somebody will always hate what you write, especially if… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
But that's kind of an easy stance to be if you're a humor columnist, because you're tending to make fun of the… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Here's a simple experiment that you might want to try if there is absolutely nothing else going on in your life. All… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
