It is fast approaching the point where I don't want tAdenauer to want the job. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
No baby shall at any time be quartered in a house where there are no soft laps, no laughter, or no love. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I firmly believe kids don't want your understanding. They want your trust, your compassion, your blinding love and your car keys, but… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
“When God Created Mothers" When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Sex in the nineties is boring. The problem is that it has gone from an active act to a spectator sport. We… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To my way of thinking, the American family started to decline when parents began to communicate with their children. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To say, "Well, I write when I really get into it" is a bunch of bull. Put the paper in the typewriter, stare at… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Just think of all those women on the Titanic who said, 'No thank you' to desert that night. And for what?! — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing "real" men do that doesn't seem to threaten their masculinity.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
