When you're lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I have always felt cookbooks were fiction and the most beautiful words in the English language were 'room service. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
A fitting room to me has always been like a confessional ... where my body and my contrition take up the entire room. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I think it's time we women stopped carrying supplies for the entire family. If children don't have room to carry their own… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Occasionally, once a speaker is on his feet, it is difficult to get him to sit down. ... If and when he… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Do you know what you call those who use towels and never wash them, eat meals and never do the dishes, sit… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The family. We are a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Sex in the nineties is boring. The problem is that it has gone from an active act to a spectator sport. We… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
It is upsetting to many parents that their teen-agers introduce them to their friends as encyclopedia salesmen who are just passing through… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I was a closet pacifier advocate. So were most of my friends. Unknown to our mothers, we owned thirty or forty of… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To my way of thinking, the American family started to decline when parents began to communicate with their children. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To say, "Well, I write when I really get into it" is a bunch of bull. Put the paper in the typewriter, stare at… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Just think of all those women on the Titanic who said, 'No thank you' to desert that night. And for what?! — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing "real" men do that doesn't seem to threaten their masculinity.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
