HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Happiness has not to all the same name: to Youth she is known as the Future; Age knows her as the Dream. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The sentiments and emotions which every literary anatomist… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
When you have made a catalogue of your friend's faults it is only fair to supply him with a duplicate, so that… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Hope is an explorer who surveys the country ahead. That is why we know so much about the Hereafter and so little… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows how to make us disobedient. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
WHEAT, n. A cereal from which a tolerably good whisky can be made; . . . also for bread. The French are… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
A book which the Mohammedans foolishly believe to have been written by divine inspiration, but which Christians know to be a wicked… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
IGNORAMUS, n. A person unacquainted with certain kinds of knowledge familiar to yourself, and having certain other kinds that you know nothing… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
UNDERSTANDING, n. A cerebral secretion that enables one having it to know a house from a horse by the roof on the… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Definition: CONNOISSEUR, n. A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
QUIXOTIC, adj. Absurdly chivalric, like Don Quixote. An insight into the beauty and excellence of this incomparable adjective is unhappily denied to… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was once more common than it is now. Arasthus… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
DECIDE, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
IMMORAL, adj. Inexpedient. Whatever in the long run and with regard to the greater number of instances men find to be generally inexpedient comes… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
REVIEW, v.t. To set your wisdom (holding not a doubt of it./ Although in truth there's neither bone nor skin to it)/ At work… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
CLOCK, n. A machine of great moral value to man, allaying his concern for the future by reminding him what a lot of time… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
There was never a genius who was not thought a fool until he disclosed himself; whereas he is a fool then only. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
WHANGDEPOOTENAWAH, n. In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster; an unexpected affliction that strikes hard. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
