It is a good idea to 'shop around' before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Mercedes. Ask… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Meetings are places where dead ideas rise from their graves and eat the brains of the living. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I'm not the only taxpayer who has no idea what he's sending to the IRS. This year, only 28 percent of all… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
My point here, young couples, is that baby-having is extremely serious business, and you probably don't have the vaguest idea what you're… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
It was not easy victory in the America Cup. Our boys spent years experimenting with different designs for their boat before they… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Many people have trouble sticking to their resolutions, and there is a simple scientific explanation for this. In 1987, a team of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you have ever seen the movie Night of the Living Dead, you have a rough idea how modern corporations and organizations… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I never had the vaguest idea whether any of it had anything to do with me, especially being a sixth grader. When… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hotlines staffed by IRS employees, whose idea… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
There are a number of people without whom I could not have written this book, but I hope you don't hold that… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees, whose… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
France: As a professional journalist, I like the idea of a society where it is considered an acceptable occupation to basically sit… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
There are terrific TV shows now. This is a golden age for TV humor, I think. There's an actual market there. Of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
But that's kind of an easy stance to be if you're a humor columnist, because you're tending to make fun of the… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
