Women are like internet viruses they enter your life, scan your pocket, edit your mind, download their problems, delete your smile... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Dana had four beautiful eyes. She wore glasses. But her eyes were so beautiful that the glasses only made her prettier. With… — Louis Sachar Copy Share Image
“If you could do me a favor and not tell anyone I, uh, threw myself at you, that would be very kind… — Dan Wells Copy Share Image
“You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends off on a saddle.” — Kinky Friedman Copy Share Image
Standup comedy is fun. I mean other than having to experience the excruciating lonlieness and unacknowledged sadness that results in funny. — Dov Davidoff Copy Share Image
You know a Girl is Mad when she starts off her sentence saying... I just find it funny how... because there is… — Kushandwizdom Copy Share Image
“Damn," he said. "Have you been stuffing yourself with desserts just to prolong the suspense?" She failed to note the humor in… — Johanna Lindsey Copy Share Image
It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered. — Uknown Copy Share Image
You don't need to curse and shout at them, instead insult them with your intelligence and sense of humor! — Glen Rambharack Copy Share Image
You could say that when you introduce humour to your work, you also step back a little from it. You create a… — Lars von Trier Copy Share Image
“I'm bored," he says. "So go home." "I don't want to. What do you do when you're bored? You don't have Internet… — Colleen Hoover Copy Share Image
“Drop something?" he asked, trying to suppress a smile but failing miserably at the act. I nodded and smiled back at him… — Markelle Grabo Copy Share Image
“Hey, Mrs. Jakes, how come people can’t afford new shoes or food, but they can still buy candy?” She smiled and waved… — Jack C. Monroe Copy Share Image
“Twenty to life, she got, with time off for good behavior. You come around next spring. I'll introduce you.” — Alfred Hitchcock Copy Share Image
“Debugging: what an odd word. As if "bugging" were the job of putting in bugs, and debugging the task of removing them.… — Ellen Ullman Copy Share Image
I am a standup comedian who has performed comedy in the Middle East in front of thousands of Muslims. And believe it… — Maz Jobrani Copy Share Image
“You are not in a fit state to come here, if you can't come here without spluttering like a bad pen.” — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
“It's not easy taking care of one's self, determining nap lengths and all that, but with two people it's a manageable job.” — Jonathan Ames Copy Share Image
