Of the over 100,000 wildfires that happen in the U.S. each year, not a single one would get started without the fire… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
We [comics] create our own reality on the show. I'm in a cocoon of the character's creation. Even within that reality, he's… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I stand by this man (President George W. Bush). I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
No one has any idea what's going to happen. Not even Elon Musk. That's why he's building those rockets. He wants a… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
If I thought I knew what was going to happen, it wouldn't be worth doing. The challenge is how joyfully, with what… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
If a poor family falls on hard times in the woods, and no one is around to care, did it really happen? — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
And that brings us to tonight's word: Truthiness. Now I'm sure some of the word-police, the 'wordanistas' over at Websters, are gonna… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
You are about to start the greatest improvisation of all. With no script. No idea what's going to happen, often with people… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Life is an improvisation. You have no idea what's going to happen next and you are mostly just making things up as… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin. If… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
We all deserve credit for this new surveillance state that we live in because we the people voted for the Patriot Act. Democrats and… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I've long been against illegal aliens, partly because they distract us from an even bigger threat: real aliens. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Believe in me, cause I don't believe in anything, and I wanna be someone to believe. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
It's August, which means Congress is on recess and Mitch McConnell has shimmied back into the ocean to seek a mate. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Try to love others and serve others and hopefully find those who love and serve you in return. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Thirty seconds is the exact amount of time Americans can tolerate something they don't understand. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that.… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I live by syllogisms: God is love. Love is blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God. I don't know what I'd… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
“Unlike Paul Newman, who seems to think that salad dressing is the cure-all for America's ills, I'm a man of action.” — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
![“We [comics] create our own reality on the show. I'm in a cocoon of the character's creation. Even within that reality, he's in a cocoon. While I'm an improviser and enjoy discovery, the show follows a script. I have a pretty good idea what's going to happen. It's a very crafted, controlled…” quote by Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/4ad/stephen-colbert-503_character_we-comics-create-our-own-reality-on-the_1213961.jpg)
