Family Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

14 Family quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

Jeff Foxworthy’s humor shines brightest when he talks about the quirks of family life. These fourteen short gems capture his signature style, offering a light‑hearted look at the everyday moments we all share.

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I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if...your family tree doesn't fork.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right

Jeff Foxworthy

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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest…

Jeff Foxworthy

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By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family.

Jeff Foxworthy

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I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever…

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare…

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.

Jeff Foxworthy

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For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on life's list…

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the…

Jeff Foxworthy

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As an individual, as a household, you can't spend more money than you're bringing in. You can do it for a little…

Jeff Foxworthy

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People should see your faith. If all you do is talk about your faith and people don't see it, but they ought…

Jeff Foxworthy

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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do…

Jeff Foxworthy

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More by Jeff Foxworthy

If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.

Jeff Foxworthy

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I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out.

Jeff Foxworthy

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We sing about God because we believe in Him. We are not trying to offend anybody, but the evidence that we have seen of…

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Hell, when I was in high school, a "drive-by shooting" meant somebody had their rear end hanging out a car window!

Jeff Foxworthy

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We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

Jeff Foxworthy

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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks.

Jeff Foxworthy

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What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Women in bed are like Diesel engines. What I mean by that is, it may take them a while to get going, but when…

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip…

Jeff Foxworthy

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