If a white man falls off a chair drunk, it's just a drunk. If a Negro does, it's the whole damn Negro… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
If I use the word romance, whether it's my wife or not, it does not mean sex. We can use the word… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first? — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The mother may be doing ninety percent of the disciplining, but the father still must have a full-time acceptance of all the… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I'm not saying looting is good, ... But I'm saying surely at a time when your child needs diapers and you need… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Guys standing around and talking about Spanish fly: 'You know anything about Spanish fly?' 'No, tell me about it.' Well there's this girl Crazy… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing will win arguments and straighten people out. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
God has a sense of humor though and he must see funny things in us. He must also have some love. We're still here… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I feel that in-person contact with people is the most important thing in comedy. While I'm up on stage, I can actually put myself… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
