Most fathers and... Mothers. Only your grandmother and Ghengis Khan know how to do it. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
God has not made anything that I know of that pays so much attention to who their father and mother is as… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
My mother was an authority on pig sties. This is the worst looking pigsty I have ever seen in my life, and… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
My children love my mother, and I tell my children, that is not the same woman I grew up with...That is an… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
My mother comes in my room and says, "Just look at this mess! This is a pig sty!" Now, I've already been… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
"And tired" always followed sick. Worst beating I ever got in my life, my mother said, "I am just sick..." And I… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I love it when mothers get so mad they can't remember your name. "Come here, Roy, er, Rupert, er, Rutabaga... what is… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
What kept me out of trouble is going right to the edge and then... thinking that my mother would be embarrassed, and… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
We are all anxious to be accepted. But if you have a strong mother and father who tell you that you don't… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
While fathers are pleasant figureheads, there is a special bond between children and their mothers. 'Do you help your mother clean up… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The mother may be doing ninety percent of the disciplining, but the father still must have a full-time acceptance of all the… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Emotionally, a person can become so negatively driven that they don't respect the privilege of being on this Earth without their mother… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I didn't like what was on TV in terms of sitcomsit had nothing to do with the color of themI just didn't… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Guys standing around and talking about Spanish fly: 'You know anything about Spanish fly?' 'No, tell me about it.' Well there's this girl Crazy… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing will win arguments and straighten people out. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
God has a sense of humor though and he must see funny things in us. He must also have some love. We're still here… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I feel that in-person contact with people is the most important thing in comedy. While I'm up on stage, I can actually put myself… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
