Ronald Reagan basically legalized every illegal immigrant in this country. I just like to bring this up because every week I like… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Barack Obama is the President of the United States, a politician in America, a very religious country, so I understand why he… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The country has become much more conservative, partly because it's been taken over by the religious right. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
What Democratic congressmen do to their women staffers, Republican congressmen do to the country. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: The rest of the world can go back to being completely jealous of America. Our majority white country just freely… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I don't know if [Barack Obama] saw the latest religion survey, but almost a quarter of the country are Nones. I don't… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
In ten Muslim countries you can get the death penalty just for being gay. If they were chopping the heads off of… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Republicans have become the party of red, white and blue rose colored glasses. By drowning out criticism with USA! USA!, they prevent… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I'm guessing our soldiers are happy to be leaving Iraq. It is no fun being in a country where there's crumbling infrastructure… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
But isn't there something wrong when I'm the only guy in the country that got fired for 9/11? — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I would rather put up with Rush Limbaugh and live in a country where we all do have freedom of speech. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep and conformists. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
In this country, a smart leader is suspect. That's just the way it is. Even George Bush's father, who was a lot… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
When I do stand-up around the country, I often see people walk out. This is a show that they've purposely gone to,… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The Democrats are very bad at selling their own product. The Republicans are geniuses at it. And I've said it before, a… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I thought this election was an adult discussion on how best to protect ourselves in the face of terrorism, but apparently it… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The president finally explained why he sat in that classroom on 9/11 for 7 minutes after he was told the country was… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The electricity is back on in Baghdad. That is a very climactic moment in any country's liberation, when the lights come back… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
People who don't like you almost never come up to you. That's a lot of years of saying things that I know… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Why are there so many puritans in this country, and why can't the rest of us make them go away?! — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
It's so childish, "greatest country in the world." It's like saying, "I have the greatest wife in the world. Not just the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The country can't get well if the people are sick. And the people are sick. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
This country hates professors. It likes Toby Keith - 'I'm gonna put a boot in their ass.' If you don't do that,… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
A lot of people say they are dyslexic; some have to realize that they are just stupid. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad`s room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
To all conservative women out there: If you are so sure the embryo needed for stem cell research are precious human life that can't… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
You see, the difference is the Republicans' hatred of Obama is based on a paranoid feeling about what he might do, what he's thinking,… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: There is no devil, so stop blaming your screw-ups on him. Last week, one of the biggest evangelical leaders in America, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
If we were a dog and God owned us, the cops would come and take us away. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: The White House doesn't have to release the dead Bin Laden photos, but don't pretend we can't take it. We've seen pictures… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I don't hate America. I love America. I want it to be better. The only way we can get it to be better is… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: Americans must realize what makes NFL football so great: socialism. That's right, the NFL takes money from the rich teams and gives… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
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