Facebook Quotes by Nikhil Saluja · Page 25

Kindness : I never will understand all the good that a simple smile can accomplish.

— Nikhil Saluja

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

— Nikhil Saluja

All a woman really wants is to know you care. And all of the sandles ever made.

— Nikhil Saluja

Going to gym really sucks. But I calculated, and there's a good news - I only have to go 9,972 times before…

— Nikhil Saluja

Without our immigrants, who will kick our field goals, or train our white tigers?

— Nikhil Saluja

BRB Have to run to the toilet, but I'll be back in two shakes of a man's penis.

— Nikhil Saluja

My cock got caught in my zipper today…at least that's what I'm telling my wife when she sees the teeth marks on…

— Nikhil Saluja

Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

— Nikhil Saluja

I can't believe it's already ummm yeah whatever month of the whatever year this is!

— Nikhil Saluja

Whenever someone says This day couldn't get any worse I immediately punch them in nose & ask Are you sure about that?

— Nikhil Saluja

If you follow me & expect a follow back, please do let me know! So I can block you.

— Nikhil Saluja

There are only 2 things wrong in family reunion. The family thing & The reunion thing.

— Nikhil Saluja

INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, is best assured when, instead of looking at each other, the two look out in the same direction;

— Nikhil Saluja

I didn't give a fuck until I drank Red Bull. Now I don't give a flying fuck.

— Nikhil Saluja

I never knew you could offend someone by masturbating. This couple just opened their closet and they look really pissed.

— Nikhil Saluja

SEX DRIVE, a physical craving which appears at puberty and ends at marriage

— Nikhil Saluja

With all these shit stains, shut your ass hole doesn't offend me at all

— Nikhil Saluja

Girls are really dressing up like sluts these days. This one young girl just got up from her seat & I totally…

— Nikhil Saluja

The rarest sight in the world is a woman who is happy with photographs of herself.

— Nikhil Saluja

Sometimes I want to sit on my right hand so it feels like someone else is stopping me from masturbating.

— Nikhil Saluja

I got a teenage daughter and a menopausal wife. One's getting breasts, one's getting whiskers. My life is over.

— Nikhil Saluja

If I ask to suck your boobs when I wake up, does that count as sleeping like a baby?

— Nikhil Saluja

I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.

— Nikhil Saluja

Woman say:I'LL BE READY IN A MINUTE. Woman means:I'm ready, but I'm going to make you wait because I know you will.

— Nikhil Saluja

Husbands are like guns ... keep one around for long enough and you're gonna want to shoot it!

— Nikhil Saluja

I read the newspaper every day just to see if there's anyone I know in the obituaries or the underwear ads.

— Nikhil Saluja

Ladies don't be afraid to get naughty. Rock his world and leave him begging for more!

— Nikhil Saluja

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more fucked up than you think.

— Nikhil Saluja

No matter how good she looks, Some other guy is sick and tired Of putting up with her shit.

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, A process much like a cafeteria -- you carefully look over the choices, select what looks the best -- and pay…

— Nikhil Saluja

God gave us the miracle of life - sustaining water, & we turned it into Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi & Vodka. Good job, Morons.

— Nikhil Saluja

Cocks are a lot like ovens. You would rather a woman was operating it but sometimes you have to use it yourself.

— Nikhil Saluja

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, A legal custom which turns a man into the captive audience of his wife;

— Nikhil Saluja

I think that a man with a helmet defending his country should make more money than a man with a helmet defending…

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, is when a husband can determine when his wife comes to the end of one argument and begins the next;

— Nikhil Saluja

Sometimes We ignore the obvious because we get too caught up in being hopeful.

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, Is a book in which the first chapter is written in poetry and the rest of the book is prose;

— Nikhil Saluja

A relationship with God is the most important relationship you can have. Trust him and everything will always turn out fine.

— Nikhil Saluja