Comedy Quote by St. John Morris Download Open image ““You little prick. It's a whelk...it's a...it's a...dead whelk!”” — St. John Morris ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 2.7 out of 5 (5 ratings) Copy quoteShare Comedy Humour Non-sequitur Satire Surreal
“The weed-whacker dad was helping his kid whack weeds. Dad was blitzed to the eyebrows on beer, and the kid was waving the week… — Carsten Stroud Copy Share Image
“Krawg's vulturebeak nose twitched in the middle of the few undisciplined whiskers that grew where a mustache did not.” — Jeffrey Overstreet Copy Share Image
“I know; I don't care to die either. But when whining mendeth nothing, wherefore whine?” — Robert Louis Stevenson Copy Share Image
“The weed-whacker dad was helping his kid whack weeds. Dad was blitzed to the eyeballs on beer, and the kid was waving the weed… — Carsten Stroud Copy Share Image
“I say, `Woe to them that have a nose, a real nose, and come to look round the torture-chamber! Aha, aha, aha!” — Gaston Leroux Copy Share Image
“But I was a fool, the biggest, damnedest, stupidest fool in thee whole world.” — Ian Cross Copy Share Image
“The dead are likely dull fellows, full of tedious complaints—the ground’s too cold, my gravestone should be larger, why does he get more worms… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
“I warn you, though, he's not the happiest corpse in the morgue. Not much of a talker, Neville Whittnish.” — M.L. Stedman Copy Share Image
“Half a million dead wops And he got a kick out of it The son of a bitch.” — Ernest Hemingway Copy Share Image
“Run. Flee. Fuck off. Vanish from my presence and take the foul stench of your sordid secret with you.” — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“On the other side of St John’s house is a fake egg timer who can’t maintain an erection. He shares the property with a… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“Private Benjamin lives next door but one to Bob Cryer from The Bill. I once saw him crouching down behind a sycamore tree and… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“Next door but one is Quinlan Broddle, a Viceroy with a fear of gardens. So much so that he sold his garden to Virgin… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“St John had been sitting in the back garden twizzling a pencil, on the end of which a russet deposit was impaled, which had… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“St John had always been a fan of the RS Turbo, mainly due to the colour coded rear spoiler and air vents in the… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“Oh yeah, well I suddenly realises that she’d only been with my boyfriend at the Co-op Christmas do when I were eighteen. So I… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“This particular event had been somewhat more raucous than usual as Derek Jameson had just lost an arm wrestle with Ann Diamond. The match… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“The Macedonian Endeavour Channel was screening live coverage of the world series of the Who’s Got the Stupidest Name (WGSN) competition. First prize had… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
“Tobak Davenport, who is a cross between some Sugar Puffs and Lynn Faulds-Wood, was squatting there before being removed by the local constabulary after… — St. John Morris Copy Share Image
'Mad TV' is one of my most favorite shows of all time and is a huge part of my obsession with sketch comedy. — Shane Dawson Copy Share Image
In the future, I would like to do more films with contemporary themes. Perhaps comedy, which is something I have done in theater but… — Luke Evans Copy Share Image
“Men circle like bees around honey, buzzing to communicate their sexual despair.” — Carla H Krueger Copy Share Image
You can't cheat comedy. You know, it either is going to be there on the day you capture or it's not. — Justin Lin Copy Share Image
I think if I have any kind of unique gift, it's more in the comedy area than it is in the dramatic area. — Susan Sullivan Copy Share Image
I always worked on holidays when I had to wait tables and stuff like that, so I'm used to it, but now I just… — Chris Redd Copy Share Image
There's nothing like the energy in a small comedy club room or a small theater when it's going really well. I can see everybody's… — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. — Garrison Keillor Copy Share Image
