Cigarette Quote by Norm MacDonald

“I went to a hypnotist. He put me under a spell, and every time I had a craving for a cigarette, I would throw up. It's very embarrassing right after sex. I find it pretty hard to get that second date after that. Girls get all snobby after you barf on them.” quote by Norm MacDonald — Download Open image

“I went to a hypnotist. He put me under a spell, and every time I had a craving for a cigarette, I would throw up. It's very embarrassing right after sex. I find it pretty hard to get that second date after that. Girls get all snobby after you barf on them.”

Norm MacDonald

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 3.6 out of 5 (7 ratings)

Cigarette Craving Embarrassing Girl Hard Sex Snobby Spells That girl Time

More by Norm MacDonald

In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers…

Norm MacDonald

Image

Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.

Norm MacDonald

Image

The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.

Norm MacDonald

Image

I'd say Jon Stewart has remained funny the entire time. Jon always makes it funny first. And he's just, he's talking about serious things,…

Norm MacDonald

Image

Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.

Norm MacDonald

Image

In theatres, you're kind of disconnected. Also, it's way too big for the likes of me. Unless you're Robin Williams or someone that can…

Norm MacDonald

Image

After months of speculation, the sitcom star Ellen DeGeneres admitted that yes, she's gay. Inspired by her courage, today, diet-guru Richard Simmons admitted that…

Norm MacDonald

Image

So much in L.A. is waiting. It's so irritating. That's what's good about stand-up. You can go away, and you don't have to sit…

Norm MacDonald

Image

You ever hear guys with small cocks talk about sex? Can't talk about it enough. They even got poems. They'll say, 'It's not the motion of the ocean, it's the boat of the lotion.' I've even heard variants..., it's not the tree or the size, it's the axe that you wax.' It's a whole sub-genre of poetry now that's taught…

Norm MacDonald

My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died.

Norm MacDonald

Image

Louis [C.K.] is great. But I don't know how many you could do.

Norm MacDonald

Image

I don't have any ego about it, but I find there's not a great work ethic in show business. A lot of people are…

Norm MacDonald

Image

Explore all 205 Norm MacDonald quotes

More Cigarette quotes

Books were always important. I have to thank my father, he filled my life with books. He didn't write but he always read. He…

Rawi Hage

Image

The risk of developing carcinoma of the lung increases steadily as the amount smoked increases. If the risk among non-smokers is taken as unity and the resulting ratios in the three age groups in which a large number of patients were interviewed (ages 45 to 74) are averaged, the relative risks become 6, 19, 26, 49, and 65 when the…

Richard Doll

We have too many preacherettes preaching too many sermonettes to too many Christianettes smoking cigarettes.

Leonard Ravenhill

Image

Since I don't smoke, I decided to grow a mustache - it is better for the health. However, I always carried a jewel-studded cigarette case in which, instead of tobacco, were carefully placed several mustaches, Adolphe Menjou style. I offered them politely to my friends: "Mustache? Mustache? Mustache?" Nobody dared to touch them. This was my test regarding the sacred…

Salvador Dali

If the fact that people make poor decisions is reason enough for the government to second-guess their decisions about dangerous activities such as smoking cigarettes and riding motorcycles, why on earth should the government let people make their own choices when it comes to such consequential matters as where to live, how much education to get, whom to marry, whether…

Jacob Sullum

“When I was young” … “Before I was twenty, I mean, I used to think that life was a thing that kept gaining impetus, it would get richer and deeper each year. You kept learning more, getting wiser, having more insight, going further into the truth” – she hesitated. Port laughed abruptly. – “And now you know it’s not like…

Paul Bowles

They represent tomorrow's cigarette business. . . As this 14-24 age group matures, they will account for a key share of the total cigarette…

R. J. Reynolds

Image

If all boys could be made to know that with every breath of cigarette smoke they inhale imbecility and exhale manhood ... and that…

Hudson Maxim

Image

The ratings thing is the real issue. It really hurts movies. For example, in Redbelt, I smoked. The whole plot of my character was…

Emily Mortimer

Image

I am a completely horizontal author. I can't think unless I'm lying down, either in bed or stretched on a couch and with a…

Dan Brown

Image

They should give until it hurts, maybe a very small thing, maybe just a packet of cigarettes, but instead of by smoking that one…

Mother Teresa

Image

You can accept or reject the way you are treated by other people, but until you heal the wounds of your past, you will continue to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work, with cigarettes, with sex, but eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength…

Iyanla Vanzant

Browse all 669 Cigarette quotes

Cigarette Quote by Norm MacDonald

Related quotes

More by Norm MacDonald

More Cigarette quotes