I don't have any ego about it, but I find there's not a great work ethic in show business. A lot of… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
If you watch that show and you didn't know it was called Seinfeld, you'd think it was called 'The George Costanza Show'. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
Our passions may be compared to certain slaves--the more severity we show them, the better they obey us. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
You ever see 'The Dating Game'? That's a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
The only two TV shows I saw do that, where they don't warm them up and you can really bomb, was Saturday… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
All kinds of violence on the TV. You're not supposed to watch violence on the TV. Children, they can't watch it 'cause… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
There's no show business in Canada, so everybody just did stand-up and we all thought, "Oh, we'll just keep doing stand-up." And… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I watch political shows for a number of weeks in a row, and all I see are guys arguing with each other… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I'm happy doing stand-up, but I'll probably do a television show eventually. If not, I'll delve into this Internet world and decide… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't; it was the real audience going crazy after everything… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
You're used to a TV show, and TV is just made for TV shows. It's not made for live events.So anyways, I… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
When I was young, I'd watch guys on 'The Tonight Show', Buddy Hackett, guys like that, where all they'd be is funny.… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I've been offered political shows before, and I don't know anything about politics and I feel uncomfortable making political opinions - there's… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I'd say Jon Stewart has remained funny the entire time. Jon always makes it funny first. And he's just, he's talking about serious things,… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
In theatres, you're kind of disconnected. Also, it's way too big for the likes of me. Unless you're Robin Williams or someone that can… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
After months of speculation, the sitcom star Ellen DeGeneres admitted that yes, she's gay. Inspired by her courage, today, diet-guru Richard Simmons admitted that… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
So much in L.A. is waiting. It's so irritating. That's what's good about stand-up. You can go away, and you don't have to sit… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
You ever hear guys with small cocks talk about sex? Can't talk about it enough. They even got poems. They'll say, 'It's not the… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died. — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
I don't have any ego about it, but I find there's not a great work ethic in show business. A lot of people are… — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image