« All Witty Quotes · Rodney Dangerfield's Page
Witty Quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
- When I was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father ... I'm very sorry. We did everything…
- I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
- I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
- I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my…
- Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.
- I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter…
More Witty Quotes
- Under every stone lurks a politician. — Aristophanes
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- Wit is educated insolence. — Aristotle
- The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
- It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. — Aristotle
- Democracy arises out of the notion that those who are equal in any respect are equal in all respects; because men are… — Aristotle
- If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving be me. — Wystan Hugh Auden
- O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- Give me chastity and continence, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty. — Jane Austen
- Every problem has a gift for you in its hands. — Richard Bach
- If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. — Tallulah Bankhead