Witty Quotes
- I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need. — Auguste Rodin
- Phil Hartman was brilliant, and Dave Foley is a really funny guy. Phil Hartman was actually even funnier offstage than he was onstage because he… — Joe Rogan
- I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. — Will Rogers
- Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock. — Will Rogers
- Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. — Will Rogers
- If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out? — Will Rogers
- The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other. — Will Rogers
- I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do. — Will Rogers
- I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago. — Will Rogers
- Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. — Will Rogers
- Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in. — Will Rogers
- Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be… — Andy Rooney
- No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. — Eleanor Roosevelt
- Let us never forget that government is ourselves and not an alien power over us. The ultimate rulers of our democracy are not a President… — Franklin D. Roosevelt
- Never feel remorse for what you have thought about your wife; she has thought much worse things about you. — Jean Rostand
- I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. — David Lee Roth
- It is perfectly possible to live a very moral life without a belief in God, and I think it's perfectly possible to live a life… — Joanne Kathleen Rowling
- I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. — Rita Rudner
- When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always. — Rita Rudner
- To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.' — Rita Rudner