Sarcasm Quotes

519 quotes by 301 authors

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement. — Fred Allen
A joke is a very serious thing. — Winston Churchill
When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite. — Winston Churchill
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying. — Woody Allen
As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. — Woody Allen
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me. — John Cleese
No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend. — Groucho Marx
How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them. — Groucho Marx
The 100% American is 99% idiot. — George Bernard Shaw
You have delighted us long enough. — Jane Austen
He loves nature in spite of what it did to him. — Forrest Tucker
The old system of having a baby was much better than the new system, the old system being characterized by the fact that the man… — Dave Barry
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. — Woody Allen
It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor — John Cleese
If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire. — George Carlin
I want either less corruption, or more chance to participate in it. — Ashleigh Brilliant
The time for action is past! Now is the time for senseless bickering! — Ashleigh Brilliant
I can do only one thing at a time, but I can avoid doing many things simultaneously. — Ashleigh Brilliant
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. — Abba Eban
His ignorance is encyclopedic. — Abba Eban

Who Wrote These Sarcasm Quotes

301 authors contributed a total of 519 Sarcasm Quotes, led by these top contributors: